- On June 28, 2016
We know that adapting to marriage is never easy. You grew up behaving and thinking a certain way, and no one ever told you any differently. Then all of a sudden you have this person living under the same roof as you, sharing your bed, your bathroom, and everywhere you go; there he/she is. Of course we love them, but it can be difficult to adapt.
So with this in mind, we decided to get some couples to share some interesting stories about how they adapted to each each other, the problems they faced, and how they fixed things. Hopefully their stories will inspire you, and who knows maybe even shine a light in your own situation.
This is Marcelo and Ana’s story:
Marcelo: I’ve always had a very relaxed approach to money. If I had the means to buy something, then I wouldn’t think too much about it. I could have it, so I would buy it. Ana on the other hand was super organised with finances. Sometimes a little too strict I think. This was a problem for us in the beginning. Imagine, one person wanted to spend and the other one wanted to save.
Ana: It was difficult in the beginning for me to understand where he was coming from. It took me a while to understand that his view and upbringing about money was different. We did a lot of pulling and tugging to try to prove which one of us dealt with money the right way.
Marcelo: I think we got to a point where we had to acknowledge that what we were doing wasn’t working. Fighting over how to spend or save our money wasn’t getting us anywhere. I realised one day that Ana actually had a really good idea on how to manage money, and we started to learn a lot together. I think Ana also learnt a little from me… Money can be used also to reward ourselves and also spent on doing things together.
Ana: I think the most important thing is that we really understand each other on this issue now. Money serves a purpose, but that purpose should never be to fight. It was a challenge understanding each other in the beginning. But after 16 years of marriage, we are really in sync and we’ve learnt to understand each other.